its been 2 weeks since i last posted,

nth much really, busy with my school work, so much so that i am still busy now.

highlights of my life,

shitted with linqiang, xue feng together in the 1st story toliet at the SPA block.

it was on a monday after 2.4

can u imagine 3 dudes,

sweaty and all,

shitting, and drippinf sweat into the toliet bowl.

i had the worst one, had to squat down to shit.

lol.

the shit smell rather unusual,

due to the fact that it was the combined effort of 3 guys.

we had a little battle cry beofre we shitted,

it was kinda loud, i believe the girls on the other side could hear us make sounds that u will not usually make when u are shitting.

it was kinda like wad the animals moan to when they mate.

i shall not go into the details,

but u are allowed to imagine.

school was usual,

but just feeling very stressed up now,

i do not know why too,

i just feel,

stress up.

i am worried,

i am anxious,

i am sad,

i am disappointed,

well,

i lifted these up to god,

and he has helped me greatly ever since.

however, there are stuffs that even god cannot help,

i am not saying that god is useless,

but is just that i have to take the initiative to do THIS.

god is almighty and capable of everything ok!

what is THIS?

well,

i think i am already very obvious,

but is she just obilvious,

or is she just acting?

does she know how i feel?

i am getting tired,

its been a long long time,

i am getting tired.

i guess nobody gets what he or she wants yea?

i got no idea.

i had already told her how i feel,

perhaps,

its clear that i've got no chance.

i have given her to much,

i think i need communicate with her less,

even forget abt her.

but can i?

i will try,

i can dare say,

she just treats me like a bear,

u now,

come to you when she is sad,

angry, diasppointed,

i do feel,

in some sense,

used.

is this the price to pay to like someone?

its pulling me down,

making me so confused.

she comes to you when she need u,

but when u go to her,

she will be so negative towards u,

saying theres no point talking to you,

hanging up the phone on u,

but,

she is just so different on the outside.

i am not saying that she is bad,

but just that,

i feel used.

she keeps asking me to tell her my troubles,

how can i when she just becomes so angry?

is it concern?

is it care?

i dunno,

i dare not share anything with her.

its useless.

u might ask,

why still wanna court her?

i tell u this,

she came into my heart,

left a mark,

and left like that,

and i am there,

all alone,

wondering wad had struck me.

"all the promises you could not keep, they were so contagious, you're so contagious,
all the smiles you gave to me, you're so, very fake..."


another highlight would be cheong wei singing in LT 5,

man,

he has a gd voive that can really be improved on.

he sang "tong hua"

really really well,

i guess that is how he can court his GF next time,

how abt this,

during his wedding,

he sings for his wife,

touching and romantic yea?

lol,

SRJC sports day is another event that cannot be forgotten,

i do not remeber screaming and laughing so hard during SAS's sports day,

i believe we are more engrossed in whos getting the hagen diaz cookies and cream ice cream,

then supporting our classmates.

well,

beside super fast dudes and gals,(guan jie, briggette)

they have the teacher's "telematch"

its dman cool,

seeing teachers run, play penalty,

man...

it was the day where i laughed so hard,

it was as though i was back in SAS,

but it started as soon as it ended,

and i am back to my life again,

wad is life?

i got no idea,

i hope that all these time spent will benefit me when i join the air force.

and,

life i getting tough,

i feel lost,

unwanted,

unappreciated.

at least i am not the only one feeling these,

i just have to press on.

with god being my shepard.

had worship practice,

man,

it was one of the best times i had in my life,

i am actually worshiping god

with a guitar in my hands,

it felt superb,

however,

i still wanna play the acoustic guitar,

the bass is just,

boring...

i dunno,

perhaps i can play better with bass?

god lead me.

sometimes,

i feel like jumping and screaming during service,

look,

we are youths,

every sunday feels like a grave yard.

if we are going to praise god,

jumping, screaming,

carefree like king david,

when are we going to do it?

no better time than now yea?

its as though we are so dead,

dead for god,

why can we jump and scream to prasie god,

only during SAJC's concert,

or sonicfest?

why?

is it the music?

the last time,

we had the sonic edge band to play for us during worship,

they were definately schocked,

youth was like,

"elderly service"

they were jumping,

swinging guitars,

as though there is no tmr,

perhaps we can do sth to change youth,

i am not saying the service is bad,

but we can rejoice, praise god,

more energeticly,

for all god has done for us,

AIE,

FREE GIFT TO HEAVEN,

ALL THE AUNTIES CAN RUN AND FIGHT OVER FREE GIFTS,

WHY CAN'T WE WORSHIP GOD LIKE WE HAVE BEEN REBORN?

we are reborn!!!

no better free gift,

i wanna run,

dive,

jump,

swing,

go nuts man.

we are living in the world,

with a passort to confirm that we are going to heaven lei,

walau,

be happy lei.

ha,

i am going nuts.

but still,

i still,

if i were to do that,

jumping,

screaming god's name,

for all his done,

i know the consequnces,

history will repeat itself,

after 5 years,

i cannot forgive what they have done to me,

i am not angry,

i am not blaming them,

its just that,

it has affected more than just me,,

besides 5 years,

i am immune to being alone.

in fact,

i am living very well with it.

is it me?

yea,

the problem lies with me i guess.

however,

how am i going to bring people to christ when i dun go for cell?

well,

better to be safe thant sry,

once bitten,

twice shy.

i recently realised,

that perhaps that i am a bastard in class,

there's this person in class that keeps looking at me in the eyes,

as though i have done sth wrong,

i think this person hates me to the core man,

but i keep bumping into this person,

i guess its time to tone down,

better be more of a friend than enemy

everytime this person looks at me in the eyes,

i just get turn off,

what have i done to deserve this?

i got no idea,

blame it on my looks,

that i look like a bastard,

blame it that lady luck is not on my side,

but,

tell me directly,

why keep doing this to me?

btw,

i do not hate this person, neither dislike this person

its just that when this person stares into me in the eyes,

i feel very uncomfortable.

what is this person trying to say?

well,

lets tone down,

just concentrate on studying,

just be a dead CT rep,

just be there,

well,

this is the real world yea?

nobody cares abt you,

even if you die or live,

you are merely just a passerby.

lol,

at least i do not treat people like that i hope.



its going to be the last week,

i guess is all out,

full force,

lets go.

and fight till the very last ounce of my very presence stands.


fishoutof water,
wondering what has fate done to him,
for him to deserve such crap in life.

its been 2 weeks since i last posted,

nth much really, busy with my school work, so much so that i am still busy now.

highlights of my life,

shitted with linqiang, xue feng together in the 1st story toliet at the SPA block.

it was on a monday after 2.4

can u imagine 3 dudes,

sweaty and all,

shitting, and drippinf sweat into the toliet bowl.

i had the worst one, had to squat down to shit.

lol.

the shit smell rather unusual,

due to the fact that it was the combined effort of 3 guys.

we had a little battle cry beofre we shitted,

it was kinda loud, i believe the girls on the other side could hear us make sounds that u will not usually make when u are shitting.

it was kinda like wad the animals moan to when they mate.

i shall not go into the details,

but u are allowed to imagine.

school was usual,

but just feeling very stressed up now,

i do not know why too,

i just feel,

stress up.

i am worried,

i am anxious,

i am sad,

i am disappointed,

well,

i lifted these up to god,

and he has helped me greatly ever since.

however, there are stuffs that even god cannot help,

i am not saying that god is useless,

but is just that i have to take the initiative to do THIS.

god is almighty and capable of everything ok!

what is THIS?

well,

i think i am already very obvious,

but is she just obilvious,

or is she just acting?

does she know how i feel?

i am getting tired,

its been a long long time,

i am getting tired.

i guess nobody gets what he or she wants yea?

i got no idea.

i had already told her how i feel,

perhaps,

its clear that i've got no chance.

i have given her to much,

i think i need communicate with her less,

even forget abt her.

but can i?

i will try,

i can dare say,

she just treats me like a bear,

u now,

come to you when she is sad,

angry, diasppointed,

i do feel,

in some sense,

used.

is this the price to pay to like someone?

its pulling me down,

making me so confused.

she comes to you when she need u,

but when u go to her,

she will be so negative towards u,

saying theres no point talking to you,

hanging up the phone on u,

but,

she is just so different on the outside.

i am not saying that she is bad,

but just that,

i feel used.

she keeps asking me to tell her my troubles,

how can i when she just becomes so angry?

is it concern?

is it care?

i dunno,

i dare not share anything with her.

its useless.

u might ask,

why still wanna court her?

i tell u this,

she came into my heart,

left a mark,

and left like that,

and i am there,

all alone,

wondering wad had struck me.

"all the promises you could not keep, they were so contagious, you're so contagious,
all the smiles you gave to me, you're so, very fake..."


another highlight would be cheong wei singing in LT 5,

man,

he has a gd voive that can really be improved on.

he sang "tong hua"

really really well,

i guess that is how he can court his GF next time,

how abt this,

during his wedding,

he sings for his wife,

touching and romantic yea?

lol,

SRJC sports day is another event that cannot be forgotten,

i do not remeber screaming and laughing so hard during SAS's sports day,

i believe we are more engrossed in whos getting the hagen diaz cookies and cream ice cream,

then supporting our classmates.

well,

beside super fast dudes and gals,(guan jie, briggette)

they have the teacher's "telematch"

its dman cool,

seeing teachers run, play penalty,

man...

it was the day where i laughed so hard,

it was as though i was back in SAS,

but it started as soon as it ended,

and i am back to my life again,

wad is life?

i got no idea,

i hope that all these time spent will benefit me when i join the air force.

and,

life i getting tough,

i feel lost,

unwanted,

unappreciated.

at least i am not the only one feeling these,

i just have to press on.

with god being my shepard.

had worship practice,

man,

it was one of the best times i had in my life,

i am actually worshiping god

with a guitar in my hands,

it felt superb,

however,

i still wanna play the acoustic guitar,

the bass is just,

boring...

i dunno,

perhaps i can play better with bass?

god lead me.

sometimes,

i feel like jumping and screaming during service,

look,

we are youths,

every sunday feels like a grave yard.

if we are going to praise god,

jumping, screaming,

carefree like king david,

when are we going to do it?

no better time than now yea?

its as though we are so dead,

dead for god,

why can we jump and scream to prasie god,

only during SAJC's concert,

or sonicfest?

why?

is it the music?

the last time,

we had the sonic edge band to play for us during worship,

they were definately schocked,

youth was like,

"elderly service"

they were jumping,

swinging guitars,

as though there is no tmr,

perhaps we can do sth to change youth,

i am not saying the service is bad,

but we can rejoice, praise god,

more energeticly,

for all god has done for us,

AIE,

FREE GIFT TO HEAVEN,

ALL THE AUNTIES CAN RUN AND FIGHT OVER FREE GIFTS,

WHY CAN'T WE WORSHIP GOD LIKE WE HAVE BEEN REBORN?

we are reborn!!!

no better free gift,

i wanna run,

dive,

jump,

swing,

go nuts man.

we are living in the world,

with a passort to confirm that we are going to heaven lei,

walau,

be happy lei.

ha,

i am going nuts.

but still,

i still,

if i were to do that,

jumping,

screaming god's name,

for all his done,

i know the consequnces,

history will repeat itself,

after 5 years,

i cannot forgive what they have done to me,

i am not angry,

i am not blaming them,

its just that,

it has affected more than just me,,

besides 5 years,

i am immune to being alone.

in fact,

i am living very well with it.

is it me?

yea,

the problem lies with me i guess.

however,

how am i going to bring people to christ when i dun go for cell?

well,

better to be safe thant sry,

once bitten,

twice shy.

i recently realised,

that perhaps that i am a bastard in class,

there's this person in class that keeps looking at me in the eyes,

as though i have done sth wrong,

i think this person hates me to the core man,

but i keep bumping into this person,

i guess its time to tone down,

better be more of a friend than enemy

everytime this person looks at me in the eyes,

i just get turn off,

what have i done to deserve this?

i got no idea,

blame it on my looks,

that i look like a bastard,

blame it that lady luck is not on my side,

but,

tell me directly,

why keep doing this to me?

btw,

i do not hate this person, neither dislike this person

its just that when this person stares into me in the eyes,

i feel very uncomfortable.

what is this person trying to say?

well,

lets tone down,

just concentrate on studying,

just be a dead CT rep,

just be there,

well,

this is the real world yea?

nobody cares abt you,

even if you die or live,

you are merely just a passerby.

lol,

at least i do not treat people like that i hope.



its going to be the last week,

i guess is all out,

full force,

lets go.

and fight till the very last ounce of my very presence stands.


fishoutof water,
wondering what has fate done to him,
for him to deserve such crap in life.