had economics alive yesterday... lol, finally had something that's was so familiar when i was back in SAS... jokers giving presentation. lol. they were zhi jun, jeremy, steven, i laughed until i was gasping for air. man... for the rest of the teams... boring... wasted 2 hours in school doing nothing at all, just seated there listening to presentations.

me, lq, jb, cw and hr played basketball after that. i never played basketball in my secondary school days, until yesterday. i have to admit, i sucked at it, lol, but i still enjoyed myself with the company of my friends. lol, all the jumping, the elbowing, the pushing, the bumps... left me with a sore nose, sore thighs and sore wrists. had muscle ache all over my body... i need to exercise more... well, we have areas where we excel and areas where we sure suck...LOL

had a little "man talk" with lq and jb... FINALLY somebody understands why i am scared, until now lq still does not understand why... lol, i call it the "boys school syndrome" lol, cannot be understood by people from mix school. lol. definitely, some similar feelings were shared between me and jb, and not lq, lol, he still could not understand the feeling i guess... LOL... lost in frequency...

thank God that we shared similar point of views on this issue...

but i am still thinking of what lq have said... perhaps i am really holding back too much emotions... well, you got to understand this, "once bitten, twice shy" even though the BILL fits, i am still having doubts of myself, my capabilities, and how am i going to handle the situation. the more i think, the more i am sure that this maybe it, this maybe the one. lol, well... RSAF? will i be affected by it? can i handle this? sometimes i really ask myself, why am i holding back my emotions? am i having too little confidence with myself?

as i have mentioned, after the trip, many views are changed, and this definitely had a lasting impact on me... will i be a burden? how about my academic results? how about the person's one? besides... i am nothing... nothing worth besides, there are others that are better than me... i should not think so much... or should i?

time will tell yea? perhaps i should really ask myself if i am prepared, and if God has it plan for this... i am really confused, and i really do not know what to do... is this part of growing up? is this natural? am i mad? am i crazy? who am i to think like this? i think i am too selfish... what can i give? nothing... i need to pray more, see what God have to say...

well... its either i try, or regret not trying, perhaps now is not the right time... then again, i might miss the chance, but do i even stand a chance? i doubt...

had economics alive yesterday... lol, finally had something that's was so familiar when i was back in SAS... jokers giving presentation. lol. they were zhi jun, jeremy, steven, i laughed until i was gasping for air. man... for the rest of the teams... boring... wasted 2 hours in school doing nothing at all, just seated there listening to presentations.

me, lq, jb, cw and hr played basketball after that. i never played basketball in my secondary school days, until yesterday. i have to admit, i sucked at it, lol, but i still enjoyed myself with the company of my friends. lol, all the jumping, the elbowing, the pushing, the bumps... left me with a sore nose, sore thighs and sore wrists. had muscle ache all over my body... i need to exercise more... well, we have areas where we excel and areas where we sure suck...LOL

had a little "man talk" with lq and jb... FINALLY somebody understands why i am scared, until now lq still does not understand why... lol, i call it the "boys school syndrome" lol, cannot be understood by people from mix school. lol. definitely, some similar feelings were shared between me and jb, and not lq, lol, he still could not understand the feeling i guess... LOL... lost in frequency...

thank God that we shared similar point of views on this issue...

but i am still thinking of what lq have said... perhaps i am really holding back too much emotions... well, you got to understand this, "once bitten, twice shy" even though the BILL fits, i am still having doubts of myself, my capabilities, and how am i going to handle the situation. the more i think, the more i am sure that this maybe it, this maybe the one. lol, well... RSAF? will i be affected by it? can i handle this? sometimes i really ask myself, why am i holding back my emotions? am i having too little confidence with myself?

as i have mentioned, after the trip, many views are changed, and this definitely had a lasting impact on me... will i be a burden? how about my academic results? how about the person's one? besides... i am nothing... nothing worth besides, there are others that are better than me... i should not think so much... or should i?

time will tell yea? perhaps i should really ask myself if i am prepared, and if God has it plan for this... i am really confused, and i really do not know what to do... is this part of growing up? is this natural? am i mad? am i crazy? who am i to think like this? i think i am too selfish... what can i give? nothing... i need to pray more, see what God have to say...

well... its either i try, or regret not trying, perhaps now is not the right time... then again, i might miss the chance, but do i even stand a chance? i doubt...