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emotions comeback intervention time


Sunday, 22 August 2010 !@#$% 10:39 am
sunday

i am going back to singapore....

dont know what to expect now... gotta work hard on fitness again, so that at least, i still can ORD as a commando...

been thinking alot these days, been wondering about what kind of person i am to others...

especially towards my girlfriend...

just feel that i have not been doing enough as a boyfriend.

at least i feel, that she is doing so much for me, and even though i have been trying very hard, it seems that i still not doing enough...

need help man...

even though i try to write down things to say even before i call her...

theres always this "slient" period... where both of us say nothing...

sometimes the conversation will move towards a time where, if i continue to say the things i wanna say, i guess it will really bore her to death...

hai... how?

i guess i will have to keep trying and putting in more effort...

but then, that day, webcam went great!

i guess i really have to look at her then suddenly, i can really talk like normal...

i also dont know why i am thinking so much... but i really appreciate her, and i just want to give back more...

i get really scared when she becomes bored and starts to tell me that i am not responding...

its not that i dont want to talk to her, and not that i am distracted... but i just dont want to trouble her with my problems...

i need to be more confident...

i miss my family... especially my brother and sister...

as well as 6th coy...

hopefully, i can go back, and return to my friends!

this is what happens when you are single for so long... you suddenly have to take away the ignorance you been living for 20 years, then spend more effort, energy and thought to the relationship...

i am learning everyday, and i am damn happy that she makes me realise how much more i can and have to improve myself.(doubt she even knows...)

especially the way i treat others, my family...

well... thank you girlfriend... AJ, and LQ for their support!


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